So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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