what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Randomize
