Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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