Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Randomize
