so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
if only i could text you this smell
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Randomize
