im about as happy as oj after his trial
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
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