i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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