tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Randomize
