Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
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