I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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