She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
