Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
