You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
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