When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
