Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Don't make out with my wife yet
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
