Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
