Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
MIDGETS
????
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
