There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
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