Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
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