Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
