I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Randomize
