We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize