Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
