I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Randomize
