Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Randomize
