We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Ketchup is God's man juice
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Randomize
