Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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