Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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