I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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