my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
