somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize