similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
