sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
The best revenge is premature balding
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Randomize
