you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Randomize
