Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
