erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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