I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Green mimosas i think yes
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Randomize
