did you get engaged???
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize
