Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
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