I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
