Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
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