Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
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