Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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