WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize
