We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
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