i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
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