piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
