I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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