he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Randomize
