He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
