white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
